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History About fishing...
It happened in the year... Probably in 1986, or 7, or 5.....
Baku Bay. We hand over the device for detecting oil film.
There is a lot of film everywhere, but... we need to reset "on clean water". From "if
it's not there, then it's not there"... We've already driven the boat this way and that, but it can't
disperse the film. The boat this time was either a trawler or a seiner,
larger than those that were driven in the Baltic, but smaller than at the World Cup. The stern smoothly went down to
the water. It was called "Niva". The chief, whose dissertation was undergoing
the All-Union tests, ran to "Bereg" and made arrangements with the guys from
some service who threw small depth charges for scientific purposes. They go ahead, throw themselves, echo sounding, seismographing, we are in the wake, catching "clean water". AHA!!
HUGE stunned sturgeons are surfacing under our side... Whoever tells you that ganoid (sturgeon)
live only in clean water - spit in their face and smear them with your boot!!
You can't catch them, but why waste the good stuff.. These guys brought these "logs"
to the stern with fire hooks and "took them on board" along the slipway.
"The main thing is to immediately rip out their zebras, otherwise the meat will immediately stink of oil"
- our chief engineer Mikhalych asserted. To my suggestion to wash them
with carbon tetrachloride or hexane, which I rinsed my samples with,
there was a categorical "NO! , but you can give it to alcohol..."
At first, I only made pies with vyaziga from these sturgeons,
but then both work and the galley became too heavy (although the fish were cleaned by men -
this was agreed upon immediately on all expeditions!!). Then I did it more simply - while we were walking to the parking lot, I boiled it in a huge tank in a minimum of water with salt and spices and put it on deck. The guys, passing by, munched on this sturgeon like sunflower seeds and everyone was happy - the guys because they were full, me - because at the parking lot they would not bother me with the question "When will you finish your chemistry?
I'm hungry!!" But this nasty stuff (sturgeons) quickly gets boring, and my team wanted
"fish soup". And on our pier there was always an old man with a fishing rod,
catching something. Here I got some tough samples, I have to work for a long time,
I send everyone to hell. And the guys decided to exchange our sturgeons for the old man's catch and
cook REAL FISH SOUP. They exchanged them, cooked them, when I fell out of the lab,
they even tried to treat me to some water with sharp fish bones,
but I quickly ran away to my quarters so as not to wash the dishes.
In the morning, problems began - the old man came home with black eyes and a grudge! His wife,
who didn't believe in his fishing anyway, saw the sturgeons and started screaming like crazy and
called the neighbor-fucker-cop. He drew up a report, took the fish, locked the old man in a holding cell for the whole night, fined their family savings for two liters of vodka (a bitch), did not let him have a hangover cure in the morning ("a braggart"), and promised some other heavenly punishments if he did not bring an "explanatory statement". They consoled the old man with 4 bottles of "AGDAM", I, who was doing well in the evening classes at the University, and preparing for the "Law" test on a business trip, composed a "Paper" in an exquisite
cathelyarite, the captain put his seals, all the "scientists" signed as witnesses, handed the paper to the old man and went to sea to catch "clean water". When we returned we found ourselves in such a "clearing" that you can't even imagine it in a fairy tale, nor in Tbilisi... The old man honestly took the Paper to his neighbor, a cop, and he was only able to read a few words (well, an Azerbaijani cop in Baku wasn't supposed to know Russian official language...). But the words I read were scary: All-Union
Scientific Research.. Inter-Republican tests..
in the water area indicated by Comrade Heydar Aliyev... issued for disposal,
personally to Comrade... grandpa, for scientific purposes.. The scariest thing was the mention of
Aliyev, (AND I AM GUILTY THAT THIS... allocated such a zone to us? and signed with
seals? so that we would not go out into the border zone and not hang out in neutral ones?
You're a fool yourself)
So the "coolest" fishing was that grandpa - he caught a couple of dead
bullheads (or whatever is found there), exchanged them for sturgeons, then for black eyes, then for incredible honor and respect, because he sat at the head of the table, and the local
police riffraff served him. And his wife, with four black eyes, was spinning around like a young woman, not knowing how else to please her beloved husband.